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Author Name: Freedyoung 11 Comments
Date Added: August 02, 2005 13:08:46 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Flamenco Dancer

She stood, almost rigid, one arm held above her head.
The other arm swept along her skirt.
He watched her as she moved, watched her glorious body,
Watched the muscles in her back work.

The upheld arm slowly fell and he blazed
At the sinewy tricep melting into a shoulder.
Bare and darkened by the sun of her country,
He wanted nothing more that to own her, hold her.

Her eyes were closed as though at rest,
But her face held a sharp and strong tone.
Passion burned her and she looked as though
She might be consumed by it alone.

And he burned as she did.  Burned inside
As the skirt whipped round and a leg shown.
A leg at once soft and also shadowed by strength,
It peeked at him, shameless, then was gone.

Red, red, red.  All around him her redness
Twirled and stomped, twirled and swayed.
The ocean of her hips crashed against his mind.
This, oh! this is where he longed to stay.

When music abruptly ended with a clap,
She stood motionless, almost surreal.
Then lengthy lashes slowly opened to him
And the room, as though still dancing with her, reeled.

Author's Notes:

I was going to end this with the man taking her home, and the last lines were going to be about them waking up to the sound of their children (implying that this beauty was his wife), but it didn't feel right.  So I left it as is.

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Comments:
Comment By: FreeAndrew on January 23, 2010 09:43:22 PM Report
well you got my castanets clacking and heels stomping - well deserved award here
Comment By: FreeCynthia Jones on January 24, 2007 08:48:23 AM Report
Congrats on your muchly deserved award. *S* Whispering Winds
Comment By: FreeLeonard Wilson on January 23, 2007 08:11:15 PM Report
IT's great, as is...I liked the dance images...len
Comment By: FreeQuiltingLady on January 22, 2007 08:34:56 PM Report
It really brought to life the sensual feel of the dance along with the sights and sounds. 

Congratulations on your award!

Patty

Comment By: FreeAdri on January 22, 2007 04:04:48 AM Report
Great poem!!!  I love this.  Congratulations!!!! 
Adri x

Comment By: FreeLady Dragonwyck on January 21, 2007 07:51:35 PM Report
Dori: congratulations on your Feature Poem Award -- very deserved.

 

Lady D

Comment By: Freetom on December 4, 2006 08:03:37 AM Report
beautiful and so sensual I love dance poems and stories you have the perfect ending

beautiful writing Dori you have an amazing talent

hugs kisses love light

tom

Comment By: PremiumPaul on August 3, 2005 12:21:38 PM Report
With or with out that ending it is a beautiful poem. I do like it, you're right!! It has great meter and wonderful tempo that increases as you read through each stanza. I really love the last line of the first stanza I think that is what catches my eye about most female dancers and especially Flemenco Dancers with there hands in 3rd, 4th and high 5th positions a lot of the time.
Paul
Comment By: PremiumMary Lou Allen on August 2, 2005 04:54:10 PM Report
Unique idea. That would have been a great ending. This is a great ending. You're just full of em, aren't you? Your descriptions are so detailed, I can see the dance. This is wonderful, Dori. ML
Comment By: FreeCombatkiller on August 2, 2005 02:17:56 PM Report
B----E----A---UTIFUL!!!! (as Jim Carey said in his movie: Bruce Almighty): which by the way, was a hilarious movie/dvd, and I enjoyed it 2000 times more."

<<>>
Comment By: FreeSamantha Firefly on August 2, 2005 02:00:23 PM Report
This is a beautiful poem. Very vivid description. I like flamenco very much.
Samantha.




 


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