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Author Name: Freerainy dayz 2 Comments
Date Added: May 10, 2006 18:05:16 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Unspecified
Category: Horror Add To Favorites | Text Only
 
The Price You Pay

Slide of hands.

twist of the cards

slowly you lose.

lights go out you are DONE.

Author's Notes:
This poem seems like a man is just playing a regular card game, but in the end he gambles away his soul.
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Comments:
Comment By: on May 11, 2006 04:11:02 PM Report
i agree with killor. my poems arent the lengthiest either, but they show description towards to the topic. yes it is a deep message, but mayb u could add sum more thought. not to be mean or nething, nice write
Comment By: FreeTE intl on May 10, 2006 07:01:25 PM Report
it had a deep message,you just need to work on making it more lyrical, adding more ya know? but strong thought




 


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