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Author Name: FreeLinear 1 Comments
Date Added: June 26, 2006 17:06:41 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Category: Humor Add To Favorites | Text Only
“Gats, gams an’ roses” Epilogue.

The boss was still out a town so I was restin my shapely gams on his desk. Prim had called a few days ago, ta tell me the diamonds had been sold without any problems. That had me jivin around the office fer a while, Diamonds may be a gal’s best friend, but when the rocks are hot I prefer a clean wad a lettuce in my mitts.

I didn’t want any loose ends ta start flappin so looked in on Vincent Gognitti, the mafia boss cousin Martin answered to. Old Vinni hangs out at this club a couple blocks from our office. They got a smokin Italian bartender, but the music just aint got energy like at Ray’s Club Alabam. Once I started askin around, real friendly like, it didn’t take long ta figure out Gognitti didn’t know about the diamonds. So there wouldn’t be a price on Primroses head, an no one could spill the beans that we had stolen the diamonds instead a handin them over ta the insurance company.

One thing I learned growin up is never give up somethin ya earned ta someone who hasn’t. The insurance goons can find there own rocks ta play with.

A couple days later I was blowin a pink bubble an helpin myself ta some of the bosses whisky when the phone started dancin.

“Beam an Sanchez; private eyes” I say.

“Rosie?” This gravely voice says, sendin shivers down my back. “It’s William.”

“Hello handsome.” I purr, all coy like. “I hope yer callin with good news kid.”

“I hope so Rosie. I am back in town and I have your share of the money from Miss Chase. Could we meet up tonight?” The bodyguard says.

“Sure thing, I’m at the office right now.” I says.

“Well I was hoping you could meet me at the La Ristorante Restaurant at seven tonight.”

“I’ll see ya there then kid.” I say after a moment, I cant get this grin off my face.

“Thanks. See ya.”

I aint been ta a fancy restaurant since me an the boss crashed the Marmont a few months back. That Will was easy on the eyes fer sure, an he knew how ta do the horizontal rumba like a pro. Looked like it was goin ta be a swell night.


Strollin in ta the restaurant at seven, my hair done up an my favorite red dress showin off my curves, I give the stiff in the monkey suit my big ‘don’t cause any trouble an I wont turn nasty’ smile.

“I’m here ta meet William Morgan.” I says.

The old guy gives me this long look, an I ant sure if he’s admirin my melons or snearin at me, then he checks the book before finally sayin “Mr Morgan is in one of our private dinin rooms, please follow me ma’am.”

“Lead on Jeeves.”

The dinin room, when I reach it, looks like it was decorated two hundread years ago. But I’m willin ta ignore that if the food is fresh.

He bodyguard looked better than I remembered his deep blue eyes made my legs melt the moment I walked in the room. I couldn’t find my voice fer a moment, an that don’t happen to ol’ Rosie much.

The grub was nice; I decided I would like ta eat there more often, if I started smugglin diamonds every week. Will seemed ta want ta get business out of the way first, tellin me how they had found the fence while I explained what had happened at Primroses house.

“Miss Chase said she will be selling her home here and moving out to the east coast.” The tall drink a water explained while we waited fer desert.

“Yeah, havin people try ta kill ya makes some people want ta move away.” I agreed, stairin inta the dark blue pools of his eyes, a dame could have fun skinny dippin in those things.

“Yeah.” He laughed.

“So what are ya goin ta do with yer share of the loot?” I ask. Me an the kid got a fair share of cabbage from this job. I got my peepers on a bigger apartment an maybe a set wheels of my own, if I didn’t blow it all the ponies.

“Yeah, about that.” The bodyguard says, suddenly all meek. “I think I’m going to move back up north to Seattle. Open up a business with my old man. Its what I always planned to do if I got the money.”

“That sounds real swell kid.” I say. “When are ya movin?”

“Well, tomorrow Rosie, I aint got much to pack. I’m sorry.”

William gives me this apologetic look while the waitress brings in our desserts, once the blond tomato has left I laugh. “Yer real sweet ta worry about me kid, but this dame aint gonna break down over no tall drink a water in a suit.”

Gettin up from my seat I sashay over to William. Hoppin onta the table I park my can down in front of him, scatterin our drinks an food. Crossin my legs real slow like I lift the bodyguards chin with my hand until I’m lookin inta his surprised puss.

“If yer leavin' tomrorrow, how about a little bon voyage party at my place?" I ask.

Author's Notes:


“There's two ways ta send a man ta heaven, an' I'm good at them both"”

Rosie Sanchez, 1952.


Thanks once again to my overlords at Bad Penny Productions, for creating Rosie Sanchez and not killing me yet.
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Comment By: FreeLeonard Wilson on June 26, 2006 06:15:23 PM Report
"Diamonds may be a gal’s best friend, but when the rocks are hot I prefer a clean wad a lettuce in my mitts." That's our Rosie..a pragmatist, of the first order.."O)


"The dinin room, when I reach it, looks like it was decorated two hundread years ago. But I’m willin ta ignore that if the food is fresh."


Can't tell you how much I love that line, buddy!!


What Wonton said below in spades, pal..You got inside Rosie's skin and came up with a real darby caper here, Alex..Bad Penny marches on!!!...len


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