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Author Name: Freewritelady 9 Comments
Date Added: July 09, 2006 09:07:52 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Category: Humor Add To Favorites | Text Only
I Learned Alot From Erma...(just some thoughts)

I left my clientís house at seven a.m. this morning feeling good about the job I had done, got in the car and let out a huge sigh of relief at not having to be "on" anymore. As I motored down the little county road and onto US 40, I noticed the sun was just slinging off her night bonnet and smiling big and bold at me..I thought, "She needs to wipe her slap happy grin off that yellow face and go back to bed." I donít know how your thought processes work, but mine, (when they do) tend to ramble like a poison ivy vine turned loose on the side of a brick house. Now on the way home mind you, a nice half hour drive down a scenic route, I saw several folks out and about. There was a jogger, (sweaty and still smiling) a couple walking, ( only if he brought me coffee in bed first, I say), a man mowing, (Iíll bet his neighbors just LOVE him for getting a jump on the day) and a few assorted cars en route to somewhere, maybe church. These people were all out enjoying their day, enjoying this Sunday morning.

My next thought was that I had left my clientís house all tended and cared for, right down to the critters that coexisted there with her; and facing me at home, was more than what I could almost bear to think about. Iíd sooner face a beheading than go home. Letís see..dishes in the sink, a floor that boasted the crusty remnants of dining with a three year old, table a resting spot for assorted odds and ends that needed to go home and stay there, ...dust? Did you say dust? Dirty word..shame on you. (Our Mothers never taught us the same cuss words apparently) The fish need fed, the birds too. If you dare to venture upstairs, it would be a whole lot easier to just say a flock of teenagers had a party up there last week that's never ended. Iíd love to be able to say that the bathroom, that used to be cleaned at least three times a week, has just been freshened up and awaits me with a bath overflowing with scented bubbles. But, admittedly, the only thing waiting on me in there is a ring around the tub, ( and we ainít talkiní diamonds here folks), a dish of soap half filled with water, an over used hand towel with smears of toothpaste, two empty toilet paper cardboard rolls and a toilet that cries,"Sit on me at your own risk!"

The bedroom, oh do we have to?? (only if you have a team of wild horses)There have been no cleaning fairies in there all week either. (A convention somewhere in Florida at the Ramada Inn maybe? ) Iíll be happy if I can just find the approximate location of the bed beneath the scrubs I wore to work this week, about ten books Iím reading at once, five plants panting to be watered, a desk that holds more coffee mugs than any cupboard, ( rings included again there too, bless their hearts) papers, cdís, an incense burner complete with ashes, three candles, (because with all this mess I need the aromatherapy) and last but never least, about four pairs of shoes scattered. I think I still have the mates, somewhere in this concoction Iíll refer to as creative expression.

So of course, the next thought was, "Well I want to enjoy Sunday too. ( insert pouts here) but I canít..I have more work at home waiting on me." Oh the trap of feeling doom and gloom and sorry for oneís lot. I could already smell the Lysol, comet and feel the aches from what I knew would have to be done in order to get a little rest and return for another twelve hour shift tonight. Then the thought occurred to me, "You moron. Thereís more whine in you this morning than the whole Napa Valley. This IS enjoyment. You HAVE a home, somewhere to go. You are ABLE to make that mess and clean it up, and late is always better than never." Now came the pep talk it would take to get me in full gear again. "Listen here sister, youíre going to have to take your medicine, just like you used to preach to the kids. You made that mess, now youíre going to clean it up, and youíre going to smile while you do it!"

The next thought, and oddly the last one before I started to hum my granddaughterís favorite song "Old Dan Tucker" went on a hike through my brain, was as simple as simple could be.

"I am going to enjoy today. Iím going to remember to enjoy every day even if it does smell more like Clorox than roses, because I CAN!"

And with that, I put on my shades, finally said hello to the sun, and drove on down the road to home.

Author's Notes:
Erma Bombeck is someone I admired for her sense of humor, her down to earth qualities and uncanny knack to describe life in a way that we can all understand, whether we admit it or not.
I really did think these things while driving home, and now, without further adieu, I am taking my worn out self to bed.  To you who take the time to read this, I appreciate it. and...
Thanks Erma, I learned alot from you...B.
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Comment By: FreeCynthia Jones on August 21, 2006 06:34:00 PM Report
B, I truly enjoyed the read girlfriend. Well done. *S* Whispering Winds
Comment By: FreeJoe Petro on July 19, 2006 09:31:45 PM Report
God bless you Barbie. That's what it's all about sometimes. But didn't it feel good when you were done with the chores? I know a Knight of the Dusty Hearth for hire. jp
Comment By: FreeDamon D. Brewer on July 17, 2006 05:08:55 PM Report

These are some wonderful thoughts and a beautiful write Barby.  I surely did love it.


Comment By: FreeLeonard Wilson on July 10, 2006 11:56:48 PM Report
Comment By: FreeLeonard Wilson on July 10, 2006 11:55:13 PM Report
This is a wonderful dose of syterical reality, Barbie...This is funny stuff..I especially liked the description of your thought processes as like vines, let loose inside a brick house..Written JUST like a writer, kid..Loved this!!...len
Comment By: FreeHenry M. on July 10, 2006 11:13:06 AM Report
Oh I loved this!! Barbie, you have the greatest sense of humor and you really communicate it well through your words, I don't think I will ever look at a sunrise again without thinking of this write!! beautiful work Barbie.     Henry
Comment By: FreeGlata on July 10, 2006 08:34:51 AM Report
Old man Tucker was a fine old man...washed his face in a frying pan

Combed his hair with a wagon wheel....died with a toothache in his heel


Yeah, heard that one too! LOL girl, this was such a great write about what it's like trying to work AND keep the home front put together!


Love you, gal! Hang in there....I'd LOVE to say that it gets better...but....


Comment By: FreeAngel on July 9, 2006 01:56:32 PM Report
Thanks for the laughter B. Dust if you must but it will keep for tomorrow. Fantastic


 Love Angelxxx

Comment By: FreeGraham Jones on July 9, 2006 12:46:18 PM Report
This has made my day reading this, it has such an honesty about, and also had me grinning like a cheshire cat for hours after, thanks for the pick me up.


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