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Author Name: FreeSensual Sorceress 32 Comments
Date Added: February 11, 2007 08:02:08 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Love's Ruby Chalice *sonnet*
A serf to another's green field and vine
In menial strife toil 'til day is done:
Gnarled fingers raw, a body bent by time,
Brown skin darkened; burned under season's sun.
My Lady's eyes warm a too long cold heart,
Rekindle desire once thought forsaken.
Her eternal flame cast light through cruel dark
From disenchanted dreams, I awaken.
Thy lips speak no words, regret or malice,
Nor shall I deny this earnest proclaim
When once my lips touched love's ruby chalice
So summer's fairest grapes withered in shame.
No fruit produce sweeter wine, I confess
If my love be grape, would that I be thy press.
Author's Notes:

Written for a challenge from James Whitworth  :o)

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Comments:
Comment By: FreeRoger on August 17, 2008 12:14:06 PM Report
Thanks for the journey.  I could feel the dirt under my nails and excitement of the forbidden.  What a great sonnet!  You know how I enjoy these.

Comment By: FreeRoger on August 17, 2008 12:08:25 PM Report

Comment By: FreeWide Awake on June 8, 2007 11:48:05 AM Report
Excellent dear! :o)

I note that you use your triple syllables near the starts of lines...aha :o)
your rhymes are kept to two or one...golden key. :o)

I also like how you put it all in one...think I'll do that too...more effective in a very liminal way...I cannot express why.

GREAT language :o) REally made this poem feel like a sonnet of yore :o)

Thanks dear! :o)

Hugs,
Pamela

Comment By: FreePaul Peter McLean on February 3, 2007 11:34:00 AM Report
Nice work. I especially liked the "press" metaphor at the end. Congratulations on the award.
Comment By: FreeGoliath Assassin on February 3, 2007 04:02:24 AM Report
Yes, yes... very magical indeed!
Comment By: FreeRandy Harrison on January 6, 2007 05:26:11 AM Report
Congratulations! The recognition is well deserved. I like the way you do Sonnets.

Randy

P.S. Most everything for that matter....

Comment By: FreeCynthia Jones on January 3, 2007 02:56:55 PM Report
Congrats on your well deserved award. *S* Whispering Winds
Comment By: FreeRoger Bacon on January 2, 2007 08:33:29 PM Report
I left a note earlier so all needed to be said is congrats on your award!
Comment By: PremiumPaul on January 1, 2007 08:49:34 PM Report
Ay A very well done sonnet.Congrats

Paul

Comment By: FreeSilkinTears on January 1, 2007 11:18:45 AM Report
Well James will have to think of a harder challenge...didn't knock you off your feet. Well done.

 

Helen

Comment By: FreeGay Johnson on December 31, 2006 07:04:34 PM Report
Aww babe, this is so beautifly and absolutely devine..I do love grapes and I do love love..Gratz on your award.

Love you, Nut




Comment By: FreeKaren Marrah on December 31, 2006 05:41:28 PM Report
Congrats Jolen on another well deserved featured award. Your talent continues to shame and amaze me. Happy New Year to You!!

 

Karen

Comment By: FreeJames Thomas Whitworth on December 31, 2006 02:59:02 PM Report
Even with something that is not in your usual style, you come up with the goods.

Do-de-do-da-dooo.

Comment By: FreeCindy Bendel on October 12, 2006 10:45:49 PM Report
I remembered you mentioned this one Jody... in a pm...I am so glad I came back to read it, for it is truly exquisite. I adore sonnets and you seem to have captured perfection with this one! Excellent!

~Cindy

Comment By: FreeLast Temple Knight on September 19, 2006 04:13:44 PM Report
Looks like this is one challenge that's been conquered with greatness!
Comment By: FreeShe Whispers on September 14, 2006 09:57:57 AM Report
Dear Lady,
 Jody .. When you write a love poem you don't mess around....
I think the real you comes out....all that passion and love spills forth as his lips touch yours
You both flow with passion as rich with boldness that become the ...
Ruby Chalice of love..
That man will know he has been loved.
~ She Whispers

Comment By: PremiumJoe McNinney on September 1, 2006 07:04:06 PM Report
I agree with Roger, this is old school Jody, I love this, Joe
Comment By: FreeRoger Bacon on September 1, 2006 03:58:39 PM Report
I enjoy the Shakesperian style here.  Very creative.  Only you could pull it off.
Comment By: FreeChuck on August 30, 2006 03:03:42 PM Report

It must be difficult to continually improve on perfections… I’m sure it’s a lot of pressure for you… and that’s going to be my reason behind my mediocrity at best… You’re great… this one makes me think of the love of things that aren’t good for you… wine, apparently yes and perhaps even deeper than that… I’m not sure exactly the mood it conjures for me… I just know I like it…


Comment By: PremiumSir Knight on August 30, 2006 07:53:39 AM Report
Well done here Jody,

   As everyone else knows you can write about anything when put to a challange ;) I loved the flow of this sonnet it portrayed the presence of life and the reality of a dream. Great Job.

 

Sir Knight

Comment By: FreeThe Mystic Poet on August 30, 2006 02:18:47 AM Report
Way to go jolen! Another gem from thy golden quill!
Comment By: FreeHenry M. on August 29, 2006 06:36:03 PM Report
I would say challenge met and conquered! Jody, this was excellently written.  Henry
Comment By: FreeLinear Z on August 29, 2006 04:47:08 PM Report
"Her eternal flame cast light through cruel dark
From disenchanted dreams, I awaken.
"

Fantastic stuff as usuall Sorceress, nice to see a bit of shakesperian delight.

Be well, Linear.




Comment By: FreeLeonard Wilson on August 28, 2006 09:45:19 PM Report
Very classy stuff, Aces...I loved that ending..Everything's better with a good sonnet on it...Nice work, my love...Yereverlovinfurball
Comment By: FreeRoss McCague Rosco on August 28, 2006 07:39:15 PM Report
This is a fine poem in the Metaphysical mode of Donne and company. You blend in the Romantic notion that the naked woman is man's recompense for a life of drudgery and hard labour. Bet that notion never occurred to you till now. Just kidding. Beautiful ending to release the extended metaphor completely into the imagination. Two very fine pieces in a row here. I hate to think what's up next. I can't help but think we're getting lower in the batting order.
Comment By: AdminRichardM on August 28, 2006 07:03:23 PM Report
Very enjoyable. Flows like sweetest wine...

Lucky be the press, indeed! Rich

Comment By: Freetom on August 28, 2006 04:10:46 PM Report
A beautiful and amazing penning Jody

hugs kisses

tom

Comment By: FreeJames Thomas Whitworth on August 28, 2006 01:40:09 PM Report
Hey, princess, Bill would be proud of this one. Not as proud as I am of you though.

 

When once my lips touched love's ruby chalice

 

This line in particular takes my breath away.

 

You did good. Again :)

Comment By: FreeDarkness Rides This Night on August 28, 2006 01:04:37 PM Report
A most excellent sonnet my friend..! We are given great fruits from nature..! And sometimes we are it's greatest gift aren't we..! Two thumps way way up..!
Comment By: FreeAngel on August 28, 2006 12:40:50 PM Report
Amazing you can turn your mind to anything Jody. Excellent

 

Love Angelxx

Comment By: FreePelagic Mind on August 28, 2006 12:15:43 PM Report

Well done period pieces are hard to do convincingly, but this one convinced me...


Comment By: FreeAdri on August 28, 2006 11:33:02 AM Report

You already know what I think about this sonnet my J... and you know how I feel about sonnets... I love this, a very impressive Shakespearian sonnet, done immaculately... Great job my J... you are just too damn good you know!!!! 
Adri x






 


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