He hasn't lost any sleep since the day his life suddenly changed.
There have been no 3 am cold sweats or nightmares where he finds her with another lover.
The daydreams though, they've been the killers.
The first few weeks were the worst. Every morning was another morning after, a time when those thoughts that he tried to bury would keep rising from the dead.
Uneasy laid his head.
Each morning he found himself wondering at what moment the self doubts, the second guessing, and the questions would make there way into his consciousness like uninvited house guests.
Would it be when he was walking, staring at the endless stretch of road in front of him?
Would he stop and watch as she appeared out of nowhere in front of him?
Would people start bearing a resemblance to her?
Would they ask him, 'Are you alright?' everywhere he went?
Would he fail to answer?
It didn't matter what he was doing.
Sometimes he would just start thinking to himself, 'If only things would change. If only things were the way they once were.'
He thought of how he could have done more.
He thought of how it ended. It hurt. It really hurt.
What happened to him he wouldn't wish on anyone.
The agony, agonizing.
Did it end prematurely?
He'd never felt so badly about himself or for himself.
He cried alone, hiding his tears.
How could he accept his loss? The circumstances surrounding it, and the knowledge that everyone would know.
How does he get on with his life?
How he emerged from his downfall is unclear, even to himself.
But somehow, the cloud that shrouded his every move began to lift.
He began to heal physically as well as mentally.
He started going out to unwind.
Everywhere he went he was greeted by outstretched hands and kind words.
He started to realise that he couldn't change the outcome of what happened.
He started thinking more about the future and less about the past.
He showed himself strong.
He could deal with adversity.
He had too much confidence in himself to be down for too long.
He had been thinking about her a lot.
Maybe too much.
Now he has a real purpose in life, a lot of motivation.
Memories were no longer something to push from his mind.
They were something to cherish.
Although something had been left behind, it was finally dawning on him that he took away a whole lot more than he realised,
and now he has a real purpose in life, a lot of dedication.
So how has she been sleeping lately?
How has she been sleeping lately?