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Author Name: FreeBlueyd553 27 Comments
Date Added: June 05, 2008 00:06:05 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Category: Broken Hearts Add To Favorites | Text Only
untitled.jpg image by blueyedsoul_cindy

how often I wish

to talk to him,

to delve into his endless ocean of wonder

immerse my mind in his keen intellect

would one conversation be enough?

no lifetime could draw more bliss,

eternity just might satisfy my need

but reality is a cruel bandit,

unmerciful in its thievery,

larcenous of time and heart.

thus i sit and wait

then find

my voice is sent

but is silenced

a hollow Echo

Narcissus never heard
Author's Notes:
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Comment By: FreeHenry M. on September 29, 2010 08:46:30 AM Report
You know what? I'll bet that if you wrote more, there would be so many of these awards next to your name that you would lose count of them! This was wonderful when I first read it and I am happy to see that recognition was given to such a fine writer as you Cindy. Bravo and congratulations!  Hugs,   Henry
Comment By: PremiumTristan on July 14, 2010 09:45:44 AM Report
So many stories within the story...  a masterpiece is a understatement for any that have not shared this place and space in time  -- and the wanting... and the waiting --  have side-stepped one of the truly painful experiences of the heart.  You have brought me there.  Tristan
Comment By: FreeTIM on February 19, 2010 03:09:14 PM Report
Wonderful. I loved it. Must say, this poem of yours, is one of my favorites.
Comment By: FreeMichael Salyers on October 13, 2008 04:37:04 PM Report
WOW! That is bueatifully and deliciously brutal. It is so true to life though. I have known people like that in my time that I just wanted to sit with and listen to and absorb the wisdom they convey. Also have known what it is like to fall for someone like that and having made the mistake of letting them know so often that this was how I felt that my opinions and thoughts and feelings fell on thier deaf ears . I think in alot of ways, you capture emotions in your writing much better than I do.
Comment By: PremiumPamela A. Lamppa on September 22, 2008 11:34:53 PM Report
Excellent work.  So pleased to see an award on this gem. Well done. ~Pamela

Comment By: FreeFilthy on August 3, 2008 03:38:17 PM Report
Great poem Cinders. Congrats on a well deserved award.
Comment By: FreesHeRi on June 22, 2008 08:31:20 PM Report
Congrats on your most deserved award..loved it



Comment By: FreeRoger Bacon on June 18, 2008 02:23:08 PM Report

All right! Congrats on a deserving award and just look at all these comments.  You need to keep the poetry coming our way.



Comment By: FreeSteve on June 17, 2008 08:08:40 AM Report
A wonderful poem.  Congratulations on the award.
Comment By: Freenoah count on June 17, 2008 07:52:20 AM Report

Cindy,  this one certainly struck a chord, and in the right key apparently.  The reflection in the water, regardless of which sense is being utilized, will always be the eternal temptation.  Fine job.  count
P.S.  Your technician used "where" instead of "were", and should be contacted immediately.  He most assurdedly has come into contact with narcissistic goop, probably in the cranial region, which can lead to permanent  thumb-up-your-arse paralysis.

Comment By: FreeS on June 16, 2008 08:07:40 PM Report
congrats on the award

Comment By: FreeLady Dragonwyck on June 16, 2008 02:35:06 PM Report
Cindy:  congratulations on your Feature PoemAward.  Very deserved.


Lady Dragonwyck 

Comment By: FreeAmy on June 16, 2008 12:10:27 PM Report

Congrats on this beautiful penning. It's most deserving of the award.



Comment By: FreeSharon Jorcil James on June 16, 2008 12:06:04 PM Report
A hauntingly sad piece written so very beautifully. I understand your pain and I know that he's smiling because you've received the award. I wish you sunshine days my friend. Congratulations on a fantastic write.

Sharon JJ
Comment By: FreeCathy on June 15, 2008 10:44:48 PM Report
Congratulations on your well deserved award for this amazing wirte absolutely wonderful

Comment By: FreeAndy on June 10, 2008 02:36:44 PM Report
This is a beautiful peice!  Lovely write!
Comment By: PremiumDavid Turner on June 10, 2008 12:04:15 PM Report
Dear Cindy,

               Who is  this  delightful piece addressed to? Where your voice to call within my hearing my ears would prick like Crab the dog's and I should be there at your feet  before the echo came back from the reverberant hills. It is so delightful to see someone using classical allusion in their poetry - this shows a depth of reading that is not often evident on CP (intellectual snob pours goop on all the ignoramuses  - wonderful stuff goop!)


Some technical comments:-

I have added some punctuation which is not highlighted and put my suggested edits in red.




I wish
to talk to him,
to delve into his endless ocean of wonder,
immerse my mind in his keen intellect
would one conversation be enough?
no lifetime could    drawl draw more bliss,
eternity just might satisfy my need
but reality is a cruel bandit,
unmerciful in its thievery,
larcenous of time and heart.
Thus I sit and wait
then find
my voice is sent
but it is silenced
a hollow Echo
Narcissus never heard


love David

Comment By: FreeRoger Bacon on June 9, 2008 11:14:26 AM Report
Take a subject like narcissism and usually find the poem about that nariccist person, which usually makes for a good write.  In your poetry here, by opening up you give us something special, a perspective of the other side. 
Comment By: FreeHenry M. on June 5, 2008 04:17:50 PM Report
A wise Woman told me once that you can choose to be dead inside or go after that which makes you happy. Love can scale mountains, cross oceans or bridge any distance, as long as that love is genuine. So, I say GO FOR IT!! Beautiful writing as always Cindy.  Henry
Comment By: Premiumwislar on June 5, 2008 10:44:11 AM Report
my first read of your writes.  very deep wounds are felt here.  touching and sensitive



Comment By: FreeShe Whispers on June 5, 2008 07:30:56 AM Report
 Once again you play with words in such a sad way how the heart suffers in the name of beautiful yet so much sadness that overwhelms the helpless heart.... I think we all have been there.....I love your poems and pictures.
Hugs ~She Whispers

Comment By: Premiumlionheart on June 5, 2008 06:31:04 AM Report
I have always known you were a good poet Cindy but these last two posts of yours,

in my mind, have put you on a much higher plane.

You are quite aways above \"good\".


Richard xo

Comment By: FreeAlison Storm Wolf on June 5, 2008 05:56:04 AM Report
One of your very best...

see? being drained and dug out by life's pains and challenges leaves such a deep well...and that to a poet means that the filling is beneficial to all.


Ali x

Comment By: FreeSteve on June 5, 2008 05:28:55 AM Report
Some very deep thinking going on here looking at the dark side.  Definitely well written.
Comment By: FreeLeonard Wilson on June 5, 2008 03:32:20 AM Report
Love that is not to be can be the most heartbreaking exoerince known to man...Very well worded musings, Cindy...len
Comment By: FreeGraham Jones on June 5, 2008 12:31:34 AM Report
This is enough to take the breath away, to say its haunting is an understatement Cindy, your work never fails to amaze me or to mesmorise me, an absolute delight to read~Graham.
Comment By: FreeZoila on June 5, 2008 12:12:04 AM Report
wow....that was really good! full of dark beauty through the words you picked...images and more images and emotions that dig deep....really liked this poem....



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