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Author Name: FreeBlueyd553 16 Comments
Date Added: January 11, 2010 14:01:10 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Category: Grieving & Loss Add To Favorites | Text Only
 
Perchance to Dream




this stream runs deeper than i would of thought

a deep dark chasm

keeps threatening to pull me under

there is no rescue from the shore

no soul within scream’s reach

haunting voices,

missed words surround me

i grab for swirling

lost moments

when i wished for more time.

hell wants to rob me 

of happy times;

you sitting by my bed waiting

the first face i saw 

when death tried to take me away;

and always being there.

stuffing twenty dollar bills 

into my palm when mom wasn’t looking

for the trip back to college,

jumping from the stairs into your arms 

when you came home from work,

and christmas shopping,just you and me,

sitting at the kitchen table after Mom died

talking like new found best friends again

i choose to forget those moments of dementia

when you looked into my eyes like a stranger,

not being there when angels came for you;

forgive me.

And when in the darkest hour of night, i am awakened

sick with loss, your bed empty now,

no chance of hearing your call for assistance

I suddenly feel your presence, 

perchance to dream?

i know not many would believe this, 

but here in this room

I know you are with me




Author's Notes:

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'Perchance to Dream' Copyright © Cindy Bendel
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Comments:
Comment By: FreeAlfred Berggren on September 1, 2010 01:03:34 PM Report

You poem has so much sorrow in it, yet you express happiness in the last line;" I know you are with me" A great way to end your poem.


Comment By: PremiumMary Lou Allen on June 21, 2010 12:40:49 PM Report
I'm stopped in my tracks. This is a keen reminder, wonderfully expressed. All other thoughts fade as the important ones rush in. Sometimes the veil is so thin that we know beyond the shadow of doubt that they are with us. Cherish those moments, and the magic of memories they gave us. This is so well done, Cindy, so very well done. Thank you for sharing these precious memories. Good work, girl. ML
Comment By: FreeTristan on June 16, 2010 01:06:07 AM Report
...between those who Love and Believe there is no such thing as a final good-bye.  You have written a beautiful poem that tugs on the heart strings while relating a sad and all too common story regarding challenges that end of life brings to those who love.  Tristan 
Comment By: FreeTristan on June 16, 2010 01:06:07 AM Report
...between those who Love and Believe there is no such thing as a final good-bye.  You have written a beautiful poem that tugs on the heart strings while relating a sad and all too common story regarding challenges that end of life brings to those who love.  Tristan 
Comment By: FreeDragonfly on January 28, 2010 02:40:07 PM Report
A beautiful dedication and story of love that continues beyond your loss. My beliefs are that your senses are accurate and you are still connected. Loved this one Cindy. I'm going to post one re my Dad after losing him from Alzheimers and other complications. Hope you get a chance to read it. Nelson
Comment By: FreeGlata on January 14, 2010 03:33:30 PM Report
So very sorry for your loss...It's always a heartbreak to lose one that means so much...Going through a similar situation myself at the moment...so I can truly feel for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you,

Hugs...

Glata...

Comment By: FreeSteve on January 12, 2010 02:53:33 PM Report
I am so glad I did not miss this Cindy and want to express my deepest feelings for your loss.  You have always been so supportive to me.    God pours life into death and death into life without a drop being spilled.  ~Author Unknown


Comment By: FreeAlison Storm Wolf on January 12, 2010 01:55:55 PM Report
and he is!

Heartrending, searing poetry Cindy.
 I feel for you in your loss and encourage your faltering footsteps back to a life, now changed but still containing meaning and relevance.
Ali x
Comment By: FreeShe Whispers on January 12, 2010 09:28:53 AM Report
POwerful  words that clutch my heart for I so well understand how you feel and he is alway with you.... I have missed your poetry...
Comment By: FreeGraham Jones on January 12, 2010 04:07:27 AM Report
Cindy you were so blessed to have such a father as this, its no wonder you miss him so, but just think of all those wonderful memories he has left you with,I have had my toll of losses this past year my mother being the hardest to bare,but they would not wish to see us unhappy,I to believe they are with us and I like to think we make them proud also,missing them is a part of life, it reflects the bond you had and this shows in your writing in abundance,so glad to have you back~Graham.
Comment By: ModeratorHenry M. on January 11, 2010 07:53:20 PM Report
I can't express to you enough at how sorry I am for your loss Cindy, words never seem to be enough at times like this. I know you have been through so much the last couple of years and I want you to know that you'll always have my shoulder to lean on and my ears to listen. While I'm happy to see you posting again, I wish it were under better circumstances. Love & hugs,   Henry
Comment By: FreeTanya Harrison on January 11, 2010 07:17:13 PM Report

This poem really tugged at my heart.  Great write!


Comment By: FreeBarbara Demasson on January 11, 2010 06:46:14 PM Report

"missed words surround me


i grab for swirling


lost moments"...such a desperate feeling of helplessnes wonderfully expressed. I'm sorry for your loss...my father-in-law had dementia for years before he passed away...such a horrible disease...I know the pain of having them slip away long before their time. May your memories be cause for joy...he is only a thought away. Heartfelt penning Cindy...I can relate to your message.

 

~Barbara~

Comment By: FreeAngelface on January 11, 2010 03:23:04 PM Report
Hi Cindy, this brought forth tears to my eyes! Just beautiful. I know you must miss both your parents very much! Its always wonderful to see father daughter relationships as bestfriends! I admire this write alot! Wished I could had , had  arelatiionship with my dad like this!! But unfortinately I did not!! You were truly blessed!!

 

HUGS Angelface

Comment By: FreeRoger Bacon on January 11, 2010 03:06:51 PM Report
The glimpses you give the reader of your father let us know how remarkable he is.  I send my sympathies to you and your family.  You had so many changes in 2009 and I hope in time your burden won't be so heavy.  Bless you.
Comment By: FreeAndrew on January 11, 2010 02:58:03 PM Report
first, dear friend, can't tell you how happy i am to SEE YOU BACK!  I know you have been through a lot recently, but it's good to see you come home....

 

great writers draw inspiration from their own personal tragedy, and you've done this with amazing clarity and insight.  i love the way you reflect upon the good while understanding the difficult, even though every fiber of your body screams out in pain. no soul within scream’s reach...WOW!!   i hope this helps in the road to recovery, but from a totally selfish point of view, i love reading new words as they flow from your uniquely talented pen.

 





 


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