As i sit my mind is pacing at a rapid speed
8 years together ,ups and downs ,many obstacles,
laughter and tears,happiness, sadness and much more.
but yet we stayed ,we loved, we continued to stand strong.
but now as my mind paces , my heart cries.
i feel like my heart is empty,
its missing the love, the emotions that come
with being in love AND BEING LOVED.
as i look at you every passing day ,
i can see in your eyes that you are not in love with me.
that you are not happy,
that every day that passes no matter how close we are physically
,we are so far apart emotionally.
you don't even try to make an effort ,
i see right thru you ,you don't care.
to you is the habit of just being ,
of just the comfort of having me there.
this used to make me sad, made me cry,
it once torn my heart so much i felt it in my soul.
but somehow it seem my feeling are numb now ,
i mean every once in a while it hurts
but the reason is because i put so much into this relationship to get let down,
to not have what i so much long for in my life to happen.
I want marriage , more kids ,family and a home with peace
but most of all love and moments to cherish.
i wanted to build alongside someone who'd love me .
i wanted to be their priority.
i wanted to know and feel the love was true no matter how many obstacle .
because it was said love conquers all.
but some how , i became to feel lost , invaluable,
uncherished, disrespected emotionally physically, you broke me .
you broke me , and i am hurt but honestly,
I guess i must say the truth as well , I am not happy,
i feel empty, lost hurt ,sadness covers my heart,
there was a time i came to believe it would get better ,
but i guess i only fooled myself .
i think our relationship is over .
somehow i feel confused ,
because in my heart i do feel it ,
but my mind is fighting it.
i won't lie , i love you i do . you mean a lot in my life .
but the pain i feel and the fact that you show me you don't love me
and that you don't care ,
has me thinking ,
maybe its time to stop bending over backwards and walk away!