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Author Name: FreeLen 11 Comments
Date Added: February 25, 2004 12:02:16 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Walking on the Fault Line
Walking on the fault line




Waiting for the day




Destiny is calling




The piper starts to play









Living in denial




Making all my plans




for some bright tomorrow




Feel it slipping through my hands









Got myself a game plan




My blinders are in place




Pretend I am a strong man




Paint a smile upon my face









At night when I lay sleeping




I hear it in my dreams




A million voices screaming




I wonder what it means









I see the lonely faces




as I walk down the street




Rainbows they are chasing




It's all just out of reach









Walking on the fault line




A face among the crowd




Lost within my own mind




Thoughts hid in a cloud









The prophet on the corner




is shouting at the sky




Everyone ignores him




We cannot meet his eyes









His message will




fall on deaf ears




To him




it's no surprise...
Author's Notes:
Just a little trip to the dark side of the moon
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'Walking on the Fault Line' Copyright © Leonard Wilson
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Comments:
Comment By: PremiumMary Lou Allen on June 6, 2004 10:38:56 PM Report
I love it, len. Roy Clark would love it. ML
Comment By: FreePaul Walsh on February 28, 2004 05:25:49 PM Report
Essence of Pink Floyd or what? Brill.
Comment By: Freeclaire fernandez on February 27, 2004 03:57:17 AM Report
wow! i love this piece. enjoyed the rhymes! it's one your best works, i think...you have so many. goes to my favorites!
Comment By: FreeBarbara Demasson on February 26, 2004 11:06:12 PM Report
Meant 'four line stanzas'...my fingers betray me sometimes.

~Barbara~ *fixin' her bad*
Comment By: FreeBarbara Demasson on February 26, 2004 11:04:40 PM Report
Len,
Your work is so varied, one never knows what prize they will find, but indeed...it will be a prize.

There is a feeling of being lost in a hopeless world here. Who doesn't pretend...it works against us but we all do it. The important thing is...recognizing and admitting it. We are all weak at times.

Love the rhyme and rhythm here, kind of wanted to erase the 'To him it's no surprise' at the end...to stick to the rhyme scheme and four word stanzas.

Great stuff Len...some times it's therapeutic to walk on the dark side...through our grief.

~Barbara~
Comment By: FreeWilliam R. Sullens on February 26, 2004 07:42:51 PM Report
Hi Len:
I really like this piece. If this is the way you write when you take that little trip to the dark side of the moon, take more trips. This is great and such a profound write about the frustrations we sometimes experience, with things just out of grasp. I, like others hope this is not your personal experience, but I have to say that the emotion in this piece is fantastic. Thanks bud, you did a wonderful job. Bill
Comment By: FreeWilliamGoldenpen on February 26, 2004 08:40:16 AM Report
An interesting poem tinged with sadness that usually comes from personal experience. I hope Len that it is from a past experience only. I enjoyed this one my friend.

William.
Comment By: FreeThe Bag Lady on February 25, 2004 02:38:02 PM Report
Ummmmm, Dumpster Man....Hoping that this is "fiction" as you can do with ease, but something tells me that it has a tinge of something in your life changin'~!! Now, don't make me swim over that Columbia River and come after you, my dear friend~! K???? This is a sensitive, caring, feeling, and terrific write, and ONE of the BEST that you have written~!! And, one more thing~!! You and I and many others have "been" on that lonely street, and it ain't purty, huh???...
(((((hugs)))))))the bag lady on the corner willin' to share cans~!
Comment By: FreeRichard Thomas Cummings on February 25, 2004 01:15:21 PM Report
Sounds like a dear tribute to the great Syd Barret! Though I could be wrong and will you wonder what the hell I am on and why I ain't sharing. Nevertheless, I really like how this piece came together. I enjoy when you write in a 'not-so-clear' manner, but that's just me. Well written and well received my friend.
Comment By: Freeerma todd on February 25, 2004 01:02:59 PM Report
Put your blinders on Len and let God lead he's good at it. All you have to do is quit trying to swim up stream you ain't no salmon. Should I be worried about you dear Len are you in a funk? I hope not but your writing seems to be on the dark side a lot lately. I get that way a lot then I try hard to remember that it will get better and it will...Erma.. This is a good poem it would be wonderful if it ain't true
Comment By: FreeLady Dragonwyck on February 25, 2004 12:45:41 PM Report
Hi Lennie!!! Interesting write -- and all too true!!!


Lady Dragonwyck




 


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